LATEST UPDATE:
Tips To Survive A Break-UpI am not a good writter,so I stand to be corrected!
I got home earlier today from work and I saw my lil sis glowing again after suffering from a bad breakup..
...I remember vividly early this year,middle January to be precise,I got a call from ilorin where I grew up that my pretty sister was in the hospital!I was told she fainted,and the first thing that came to my mind was" she don SWALLOW!" ..I had to rush down the following saturday to see her,'coz my mom said she wasn't talking to no one!
Fastforward to ilorin..I saw my sister lying on the sickbed,looking so pale and ugly !WHatttttt!what happen
Alas,she just broke up with her boyfriend of 3yrs and 4months...it was so had for me to believe,'coz no one would ever believe the love birds could seperate!
I called the guy immediately and demanded to know why he did that to my cutie pie!
He replied bluntly that,he was no longer interested because my sis use to cover her bosoms and some parts of her body during intimacy!Whatttttttt
Is it now a crime to be a good/shy girl
he said he needed a crazy Dam. for a girlfriend not one holy Maria!toh!
I had to take my sis down to Lagos two days later!she just graduated from school,waiting to go for her youth service..the first thing I did was introduce her to nairaland,which she enjoys a lot!followed by the following tips
1.Cry all you want. Let the tears flow, it's healthy you are releasing grief and pain. You may be afraid to start because you're fearful you'll never stop, but you will.
2.Do something everyday to help yourself heal. Exercise, read, watch some self-help TV/DVD's, learn to meditate and never underestimate the power of positive prayer. Pick things that you know will be fun or beneficial and do them. Don't wait for the mood to come over you, take one action and then take another.
3.Find emotional support. There are numerous groups for the newly single (more for women than for men). If you want therapy, go to
http://ift.tt/16fm8sl to find a licensed marriage and family therapist in your area. Just don't try to tough it out or go it alone, support from others is healing, even if those people never become close friends.
4.Don't be a doormat. If your soon-to-be-ex continues to call you or simply won't go away (or move out) tell them you can't heal with them around and ask them to keep their distance. If they are harassing or threatening you it is best to call law enforcement for information and advice.
5.Keep busy. If you wake up early take a walk, go out to breakfast or do something around the house. Try a little "retail therapy" (go shopping) or enjoy the decadence of going to a movie in the middle of the day. Many businesses allow their staff to take "mental health days" if needed. If you can't sleep do the crossword puzzle, read or watch TV. Don't sit in your room and ruminate, you have to free your mind so your heart can heal.
6.Don't try to mask your pain by trying to find a replacement. We all know the term "rebound relationship" these happen when we (unconsciously) use another person to fill the gap that's been created by the ending of a relationship. These transitional connections can feel healing in the short term, but if you don't process your pain appropriately you will not be able to be in a fully committed partnership.
7.Don't spend too much time alone. Hang out with friends or make new ones, go to coffee with someone you can talk to, volunteer in your community. You will need time alone, but if you isolate yourself you won't be able to fully process your feelings or get the support you need to heal.
8.Trust your feelings. Even if you were taken by surprise by the breakup, your inner voice is telling you something. Listen carefully and you will hear that it will all be OK. You just have to let your feelings guide you.
9. If you were friends with your ex's family, realize that this relationship is gone as well. They will find it awkward to continue seeing you, no matter how close you were to them.
10.Research. Find out what others, who have not just survived but thrived after their relationships ended did to achieve peace of mind. There are some great books on surviving a breakup, my favorite is "How to Survive the Loss of a Love" by Peter McWilliams. This little gem will give you insight, exercises and some sage advice for dealing with this heart wrenching issue.
Trust that you were not put here to suffer and that your live will not just be OK, it will be wonderful. Love will come again and next time, if you have truly processed your feelings, it will be much better. Having to work through some alone time doesn't need to be totally painful. Remember that even though change is mandatory, suffering is optional.
I am so glad I could help after 8months..
If you are ,or once suffered from a bad breakup,those tips helps a lot!
Best of luck!
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